Child Custody

questions & answers

Question: Can a child of age 14 decide which parent he wants to stay with?


Minors can not decide which parent they want to live with, but the court highly weighs best interest of the child.

Arizona law does not generally allow a minor child to formally "choose" which parent he or she will live with. This is for a number of reasons. First, children often change their minds about which parent they like better.

The other reason why the law does not usually allow a child to select a custodian is simply because it places too much pressure on the child. It is a tough decision to have to make. Furthermore (and unfortunately), there are some parents who might pressure, threaten or bribe their kids to choose one way or another if they knew that the decision was up to the child. The law needs to apply equally to everyone.

The court will hear your opinion before making any decision about custody. This and the other factors considered can be found at A.R.S. 25-403(A)(2). In other words, you have a voice, but not a choice.

There are a number of ways for the judge to ask for your opinion. The judge can order a therapist to conduct a custody evaluation which would involve one or more interviews between you and the therapist assigned to the case. The therapist would then write a report that includes a summary of all the things the child has to say, and give it to the judge.

Alternatively, Arizona state law permits the judge to talk directly to the child in private chambers where the child would not be pressured by either parent to say things a certain way.

Finally, the judge has the option of appointing a lawyer to represent only the child. The appointed attorney would interview the child and advocate the child's position just as the lawyers for your parents are supporting what they have to say.

A lot will depend on the age of the child. While there is no magical age at which a child's opinion becomes more important, it is easier for a teenager to express him or herself more clearly simply because of maturity and greater life experience than a child who is still in elementary school.


  • Can a child of age 14 decide which parent he wants to stay with?




  • Please select your county of residence below.



  • State Bar of Arizona
  • Maricopa County Bar
    Referral number 602-257-4434
  • Pima County Bar
    Referral number 520-623-4625
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline
  • Bankruptcy Court Self Help Center
  • Certified Legal Document Preparer Program


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